Beloved HAFTR Educator and Mother of Four is Nifteres Following
Tragic Hewlett Accident
At the levayah of Allison “Ally” Rahmani a”h, her close friend Shayna Ungar spoke about the Hebrew words nega, meaning affliction, and oneg, meaning joy. The words contain the same letters, but the placement of the ayin, which also means “eye,” changes their meaning.
Ungar said Allison possessed an ayin tovah, a good eye. She noticed what others missed, recognized what could be improved, and acted.
Ally was nifteres on Friday, August 21, just six days after her 40th birthday. Her petirah has left her family, students, and the wider Five Towns community mourning a devoted mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, and educator.
Born in New York City, Allison grew up alongside her siblings Jamie, Kevin, Talia, and Dana. Her childhood friend Rachel Feldhamer recalled that their backyards connected and that Allison spent countless hours playing with the other girls on the block. Feldhamer remembered her singing “Allison Road,” as well as the smile and laugh that remained unmistakably hers.
Her siblings described Ally as artistic, creative, intelligent, dramatic, and fiercely competitive. Her older sister Jamie, born exactly 25 months before her, recalled how their lives followed similar paths. Both became teachers, settled in the Five Towns, and raised families whose children grew up together.
Ally’s mother, Rachelle Rohde, said the women in their family called themselves the “wise women.” They traced their strength, work ethic, and devotion to family to Ally’s beloved grandmother, who had been nifteres six months earlier. She taught them that when something had to be done, they found a way to do it and moved forward.
Ally brought that determination to nearly everything. Her brother Kevin noted that when she entered a room, she could light it up with her smile and laughter. She was funny, stubborn, energetic, and never inclined to do anything halfway.
Ungar shared one story that reflected Allison’s competitive spirit. The two friends were expecting babies three weeks apart when Ungar called from the hospital to say she was in labor. Allison was still conducting parent-teacher conferences at HAFTR but declared that she intended to have her baby first.
After completing every conference, Allison went home and began walking until she, too, went into labor. The two friends ended up in hospital rooms across the hall from one another. When Allison’s son Zachary was born, Ungar received a photograph of the newborn with two words beneath it: “I win.”
Ally and her husband, Matthew Rahmani, built their life together from modest beginnings. Matthew recalled living paycheck to paycheck in their first apartment while Allison was still in school. As they expanded their family, advanced in their careers, and moved from one home to the next, Ally repeatedly assured him that they would be all right.
Together, they raised Nathan, Jake, Zachary, and Chloe. Ally was her children’s strongest advocate and most enthusiastic supporter. After three boys, she delighted in welcoming the daughter she had long hoped for, affectionately known in the family as “Princess Chlo Chlo.”
Rohde spoke about her final conversation with Allison on Friday morning. Allison offered her mother thoughtful advice before they discussed Chloe beginning school and the mattress she needed for rest period. Allison joked that her daughter deserved the “Rolls-Royce of mattresses.”
Only days earlier, Ally, her mother, and Chloe had spent a day together at the beach. Rohde remembered it as one of the best days the three had shared.
Beyond her family, Ally devoted herself to the children she taught at the Hebrew Academy of the Five Towns and Rockaway. She served as math coordinator, although she preferred the more colorful title of “math principal.”
Ally loved math and believed that a teacher could change a child’s life. When colleagues worried about challenging students, she reminded them that there were no bad children. Where others saw difficulty, she saw potential.
If a student needed additional support, Ally stayed after school for as long as necessary. Ungar recalled calling her two hours after the school day ended and finding her still tutoring the same child. Allison might charge the family for only half an hour, but she remained because the student needed her.
Her concern extended beyond academics. After the mother of several young HAFTR students was nifteres, Ally began thinking about the little girls returning to school without their mother to prepare them each morning.
She set up a small beauty salon in her classroom with brushes, hair products, barrettes, scrunchies, and snacks. Each morning, Ally did the girls’ hair so they could begin the school day feeling cared for and looking like their classmates.
Matthew said they had discussed whether Ally should leave HAFTR to concentrate fully on motherhood, but she could not walk away from her students. She knew they needed her and understood what she could accomplish as their teacher.
On Friday morning, Allison was in her SUV in the driveway of her family’s Hewlett Bay Park home when, according to Nassau County Police, she lost control of the vehicle. The SUV struck a tree and an unoccupied parked car before plunging into the family’s in-ground swimming pool.
Ally was reportedly able to call for help after the crash. She was removed from the vehicle before police arrived, and responding officers administered first aid. She was transported to a nearby hospital, where she was pronounced deceased.
According to published reports citing sources close to the investigation, Ally may have suffered a medical episode before losing control of the vehicle. Police have not publicly confirmed the cause of her petirah, and the investigation remains ongoing. Authorities do not suspect foul play.
The previous week, Ally’s friends had arranged a special birthday Shabbos for her. She later told Ungar that it had been the best Shabbos of her life.
Matthew had also surprised her with a trip to Paris in celebration of her 40th birthday. They were scheduled to leave on Sunday, August 23. Instead, their family and community gathered that morning at Boulevard-Riverside Chapels in Hewlett for her levayah.
Matthew, who serves as president of Irving Place Minyan in Woodmere, began his hesped by reciting Eshes Chayil. He apologized for not having sung it at their wedding and said he could imagine no more fitting words for the woman Allison had been. “You were my boat, you were the wind in my sail, and you were my north star,” he told her.
Matthew recalled how Ally saved the notes and messages she received from students describing what Mrs. Rahmani had meant to them. “That was your essence,” he said of the confidence she gave others. “Now it’s your legacy.”
One of the rabbanim addressing the mourners acknowledged that some tragedies offer no human explanation. There are times when faith provides answers, and other times when faith asks people to live with questions.
Allison’s family pledged to surround Matthew and the children and help them continue the life she had planned for them. The community offered the same commitment, promising to stand beside them in the years ahead.
K’vurah was at New Montefiore Cemetery.
Allison’s petirah was sudden and horrifying, but it will not define her. She will be remembered for the family she nurtured, the students she believed in, and the needs she recognized without being asked. She taught those around her to look closely, see the good in another person, and act when someone needs help.
May her family be comforted among the mourners of Tzion and Yerushalayim, and may her memory forever be a blessing.
By Shabsie Saphirstein