Every morning when you get up, you check the list of the 100 richest people in the world, and you’re still not on it. Groan. Day in, day out. Got up, brushed your teeth, got the kids ready, off to work, and back home again. Do you feel alive? I know, you’re living; but how alive do you really feel?

Stop for a moment. When was the last time your senses were awakened? Do you feel the balance and harmony of everything around you? How much time are you spending thinking about what you are missing in your life?

You feel kind of empty, restless, and bored a lot of the time. Or you’re so busy that you actually feel numb. You dream about a better job, a larger house – bigger, finer, and shinier everything. More, more, more. But guess what, sweet friends? Nothing external can ever fill us internally. Trust me: When you climb to the top of that professional or social mountain, there will be another one waiting for you to ascend. Dorothy never said: “There’s no place like the office.” Another myth, make-believe mirage promising happiness and fulfillment.

Does your day start backwards? You wake up tired, and you go to bed wide awake? So why do they call it “beauty sleep” when you wake up looking like a troll? I know, you’ve tried everything to get to sleep. Well, except that thing where you shut off your phone and close your eyes. Don’t expect to feel energized, exhilarated, and excited on two hours of sleep. Without sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds. I know, you’re looking for a moisturizer that hides the fact that you’ve been tired since 2010. Lol. If your body does not get what it craves and truly needs, chances are you feel drained, dozy, or debilitated a lot of the time. Not exactly the recipe for vitality.

We humans cannot anchor into a sense of purpose without finding a spiritual path that feels right to us. Do you have any rituals that make you feel safe and snug in this ole world? If you don’t, sweet friends, I’m here to say that you should. No, you do not need to chant mantras in a dimly lit room; but you need to find some actions that are filled with deep significance to you. You may wish to create a ritual every evening by spraying chamomile or tea tree oil in your bedroom to alleviate the day’s stress. Inhale slowly and visualize all that tension flowing out of your tired body.

What? You don’t know the meaning of life because your computer is down? Trust me: Google, pop culture, and the mainstream media do not have the answers. What if there was no Google? Good question. Google it. But seriously, please know what your beliefs are about love, life, death, and spirituality. Don’t forget to nourish, nurture, and nurse that soul of yours. Pop the cork that you put on your heart and let those past vulnerable and fragile feelings out finally.

Watch a relaxation video of wind blowing, and envision all of your troubles on the leaves of the trees. Let the gusts of wind carry your anxiety and sorrow with it, and watch calmly as it floats away into thin air. I know. Your favorite yoga pose is whatever the Sanskrit word is for “nap.” But if you do not connect to something larger than yourself, you will ultimately feel somewhat empty or even alone. You’ve mastered the selfie; now master thyself.

Second only to broth, bouillon, or borscht, Nature is the best medicine cure-all you can take. Walk barefoot in the sand, roll around in the grass, or kick those leaves. Take a hike with a friend. After all, it’s not about the miles. It’s about the smiles.

And finally, my friends: Open your mouth only when what you’ve got to say is more beautiful than silence. And don’t save up love like you’re going to retire on it. Instead, give it away like you’re made of it.


Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens.  She works with individuals, couples, and families.  Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends.  She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.  or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.