Hello. How are you? Better, now that you asked. Awww. How are you? “Well, I haven’t had my morning coffee yet and no one has gotten hurt. So I’d say: So far so good.” And how are you? Armed and ready. I was fine until you asked. Uh, oh.
Do you sometimes feel like you’re in some hidden camera show? You’re living in a crazy world, but a crazier world is living within you? You can stop driving me crazy. I can walk from here. The media has taken over your social news feed and headspace. Now all you feel is stressed, strung out and shell-shocked.
Has your life been flipped on its head? If most people around you remain consumed with panic, trepidation, and terror, how on earth can you stay happy and hopeful? You may be tired of hearing how important your emotional well-being is, but deep down you know you must find a sense of normalcy somehow. Have you?
It is not healthy, sweet friends, to live in a constant state of uneasiness. Your mental health is unequivocally as important as your physical health. This era of prolonged, enforced “anti”-social distancing is forcing you to exchange one for the other.
Who wants to surf endless waves of harrowing, horrendous, or horrible news? If you can be anywhere near the ocean: Seas the Day. I’m having a wave of nostalgia. I used to be current. But truly, there’s nothing like a sea breeze to put your mind at ease. Heck, let the ocean worry ‘bout being blue.
There is no better way to take you out of your own stressed-out spiral than to reach out and try to find ways to help others. Don’t lose interest in things you care deeply about or let your passions fizzle out. You can always make a difference. Know that.
You see humans, but no humanity. You can still find peace in a world that has lost its mind. Keep functioning in this broken society of ours. Do things that move you.
I know, the dismal, distressing, discouraging news still manages to filter through all your defenses. Please avoid people, even friends, who simply thrive on drama. Who gossips to you, will gossip about you. Ever notice how no one gossips about anyone else’s virtues? Some people should use gluestick instead of chapstick. They may dress up their voyeurism as concern – sharing every morsel of bad news they can find – but trust me: This will not nurture your or anyone else’s inner universe. And just because something may be true, that does not mean it should be passed around. You can’t un-tell someone something. Ask me, don’t ask about me. My rule: Keep his name out of your mouth, unless you are praying for him.
Enough binge eating, Facebook surfing, or Netflix marathons. Do you want money from Facebook? It’s easy. Just go to your account setting. Deactivate your account, and go to work... I know. Facebook is like your fridge. You know there’s nothing there, but you check it every ten minutes anyway. And you know that Netflix gives you 15 seconds between episodes to decide whether or not you’re going to do anything with your life today.
Here’s my mantra: If it cost you your inner peace, sweet friends, you overpaid. Can you think of anything that actually makes you feel better about humanity? The more good things you seek, the more you shall find.
You look around you and see that reasoning has been trampled by hypocrisy and chaos. Criminals are lauded as heroes, and justice is perverted on a daily basis. Do not absorb all the crazy around you. Inevitably you will take sides. Take your moral inventory. Know what you stand for and why. You may not be in a position to enact laws for mankind, but you can govern your own actions.
It’s nearly impossible to spend a day of relative sanity without someone trying to make you feel gonzo and whacko again. You have this gnawing feeling that we are all losing our collective minds. Gently remind yourself that this ole world has gone stark raving mad before. Oppressors and bullies have ruled us, and yet we overcame and rose from the ashes. You say you have nothing left to give? Give hope.
Find others who give you a unifying sense of decency and humanity. Trust me, you can try to create an ideological bubble around you, but it won’t last long. It’s okay to spend time with like-minded people. After all, our lives are based on a shared humanity. We have neighbors. Want to flip their lid? Name your van “FBI Surveillance Van.” Heh.
Never underestimate the power of a bubble bath, hot shower, fuzzy socks, a book you can’t put down, or your favorite Disney movie. Stay out of the gravitational pull of negativity around you. Remind yourself that you are living with more wealth and access to information than anyone in human history. So what’s right in your life?
Do what you can within your own arm’s reach. Trust me on this, my friends: The smallest act of love can change the world.
Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens. She works with individuals, couples, and families. Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends. She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.
