There’s a game that “the kids” play. It’s called “Two Truths and a Lie.” As the name suggests, when you are among a group of friends, you divulge two truths about yourself and one lie. Then they’re supposed to choose which one is the lie. It’s a game that is supposed to shock some friends – especially if one of your truths is something they never knew or would never guess about you.
I’ll provide an example. Choose the lie from the following three statements:
I am deathly scared of spiders. No animal needs so many legs (not even centipedes!).
On a date, I pretended to be a member of the LPGA (Ladies Professional Golf Association).
I was pulled over for speeding twice on the same day.
The lie: I was pulled over twice on one day for speeding. Usually, the truths and the lie are far more interesting than the ones I provided, but you get the picture.
In the same spirit of the game, I will provide three short dating tales. It’s up to you to choose which one is the lie. But to make it more fun, I’ll make it three truths and a lie.
Story #1
Chumie was single, while most of her friends had serious boyfriends or were married. Chumie’s friend Henny wanted to help. She kept talking to Chumie about letting her set Chumie up with her boyfriend’s friend. You see, Henny and her boyfriend had been dating for three years. Henny wanted Chumie to feel the same happiness she was feeling by being in a relationship. Chumie kept refusing Henny’s offer. Henny took this to mean that Chumie was nervous and suggested that she and her boyfriend double-date with Chumie and her boyfriend’s friend, Simcha. Finally, Chumie relented. The night came, and Chumie and Simcha went on a double date with Henny and her long-time love. Chumie had a great time and wanted to go on another date with Simcha, but this time, no double-dating. When Chumie called Henny the next morning, she found out that later, after the date the previous night, Henny and her boyfriend had gotten into a huge argument and broke up. Luckily, Chumie was able to get Simcha’s phone number. The two connected again and became chasan and kallah.
Story #2
Leah met Chanah in school. They became fast friends. Both came from different backgrounds, different hashkafos, different interests, but the friendship worked. One day, Chanah told Leah that her brother Meir was coming home from yeshivah, and she would love it if Leah would go on a date with him. Chanah explained that her brother was just like Leah, and they would be the perfect match. Leah agreed; how bad could one date be? She really did it in order to be a good friend to Chanah. Soon, Meir and Leah became chasan and kallah.
Story #3
Miri was very firm in what she was looking for in a husband. She had a list; she was willing to compromise but not settle. Suitor after suitor came to her front door. Less than half came a second time, and less than half of those returned a third time. Friends at work started to talk to her about one of the single men working in the same company. Miri said no to several co-workers several times. This “fellow co-worker” didn’t match anything on her list. She didn’t want to waste her time. And Shia, the fellow co-worker, didn’t want to date someone who was the opposite of what he was looking for. Little did everyone know that Miri and Shia were secretly dating, and as the saying goes, “opposites attract.” They shocked everyone at work when they announced their engagement.
Story #4
Chaya was a homebody. She never went to a sleepover – by choice. She never wanted to go to a sleepaway camp. She never wanted to go to Israel for seminary. In fact, when she was 22, her friend from down the block invited her over to her house to sleep. The friend’s parents were away, and she invited four girls to spend Shabbos with her. Chaya agreed to join them for the meals and fun, but she would walk down the block back to her house to sleep on Friday night and then rejoin the girls on Shabbos morning. Chaya was firm about dating men from the New York area. She wouldn’t go and sleep down the block in the house of a lifelong friend; how was she expected to move hundreds of miles away with “a stranger”? Of course, once you marry a man, he is no longer a stranger, but Chaya hadn’t met anyone who would make her want to move out of the neighborhood, let alone out of state. One day, Chaya was redt a shidduch by a shadchan she had never met. The shadchan knew “of a boy from Baltimore.” Chaya listened and agreed to go out, thinking nothing would come of it, because nothing had come from anyone she had dated until that point. Lo and behold, six months later, Chaya visited her mother at work to say goodbye as she was moving to Baltimore with her new husband. As Chaya walked to the car after kissing her mother, she didn’t look back. Chaya said that had she looked back, she may not have gotten in the car.
Any guesses?
Which are the three true stories, and which one is the lie? There are only three people in this world who can answer that question without any hesitation – only three people who know the truth.
APRIL FOOLS! A little late, but still April Fools! All four are true stories, and they are published here to show that Hashem works in mysterious ways. And no matter what we want or what we imagine, we are not the ones in control.
Story #1 – My paternal grandparents. My grandmother’s friend was begging her to date her boyfriend’s friend for months. My grandmother was shy and felt uncomfortable until the double date was suggested. My grandparents hit it off, and the couple that had been dating for three years never saw each other again after my grandparents met. Coincidence, or maybe Hashem’s plan?
Story #2 – My maternal grandparents. My great-aunt and grandmother were friends, but from very different backgrounds. My great-aunt really sold her big brother to her friend Leah. The favor that my grandmother did led to decades of marriage and lifelong friendship.
Story #3 – Yes, some of you may have guessed, that’s the story of how I came to marry my husband. Again, he didn’t match anything on my list, and I didn’t match anything on his list, but my wedding ring fits my finger perfectly. Throw away your lists! You are marrying a real person, not a piece of paper.
Story #4 – That is the story of my sister and brother-in-law. And my sister will tell you now that she wouldn’t move back to New York for all the money in the world. She found someone who made her want to go away!
Maybe one or all of these true stories can help someone, and something can be learned. Remember, it’s not always how we imagined it; but in time, it ends up with what we never knew we wanted.
Hatzlachah to you all!
Goldy Krantz is an LMSW and a lifelong Queens resident, guest lecturer, and author of the shidduch dating book, The Best of My Worst and children’s book Where Has Zaidy Gone?
She can be contacted at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..
