There was an elderly carpenter who was ready to retire. He told his boss of his plans to leave the house-building industry in order to enjoy a more leisurely lifestyle with his wife. He would miss the weekly paycheck, but he was ready to retire, and they could get by on his savings.
The contractor was sorry to see his best worker go and asked if the carpenter could build just one more house as a personal favor to him. The carpenter was reluctant, as he really was ready to retire, but the contractor pushed him until he relented. However, it soon became clear that his heart was just not in it. He resorted to shoddy, hasty workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career. When the carpenter finished his work, his boss came to inspect the house. He then handed the keys to the carpenter and said, “This is your house, as my parting gift to you.”
The carpenter was shocked! If only he had known he was building his own house, he would have invested so much more effort.
The same is true of our lives as well. Through every day and every action, we are building our own home, our eternal existence. The mind we’re building, the views we attach ourselves to, the thoughts we generate: This is the reality that we live in. If we were aware of this, we would be so much more careful with how we laid down each brick.
The Battle Between Yaakov And Eisav
In our last article, we discussed the cosmic battle between Yaakov and Eisav, the battle between ikar and tafel. To review, the ikar is the inner essence and main entity, while the tafel is that which enables the ikar to flourish. The ideal is for the tafel (that which is secondary and lower) to perfectly and loyally reflect the ikar (the inner spiritual essence): for the body to faithfully reflect the truth and depth of the soul, for all of physicality to fully reflect its spiritual root.
Both Yaakov and Eisav wanted the spiritual and the physical, and this was the root of their battle. Yaakov wanted to use the physical as a vehicle for the spiritual, as a tool to fully utilize and actualize spiritual potential. Eisav, on the other hand, sought to use the animation of the soul to indulge in the physical. Essentially, Eisav flipped the ikar and tafel; he viewed the physical as ikar and the spiritual as tafel, a necessary instrument for experiencing the physical world. This was the battle between Yaakov and Eisav: a battle of ikar versus tafel, a battle of perception.
The Relationship That Could Have Been
Originally, Yaakov and Eisav were meant to work together, in a synthesized, harmonious partnership. Yaakov would perfect the spiritual, the ikar, while Eisav would perfect the physical, the tafel, creating a perfect vessel for Yaakov. The spiritual (Yaakov) was meant to imbue and fully manifest within the physical (Eisav). Together, they would have converged to become a single, cohesive unit, working as one.
Yitzchak saw this potential within Eisav, which is why he originally sought to give Eisav the brachos. However, a careful reading of the Torah makes it clear that Yitzchak intended to bless both Yaakov and Eisav: Eisav for the physical domain and Yaakov for the spiritual domain. This is why Yitzchak ultimately gave Yaakov two sets of brachos: the one intended for Eisav (Bereishis 27:28–29) and the one he always planned to give Yaakov (Bereishis 28:1–4). This was a recognition of Yaakov’s and Eisav’s unique roles: Eisav as the physical vessel and Yaakov as the spiritual essence.
However, Eisav corrupted his mission, and instead of perfecting the physical as a loyal vessel for the spiritual, he isolated the physical as an end in itself, completely disconnecting it from the spiritual. When Yaakov saw this, he realized that Eisav would not fulfill his part of their partnership. He therefore decided to intervene and buy the bechorah, taking on Eisav’s role in addition to his own. Yaakov now became responsible for both aspects of their intended partnership: perfecting the spiritual and perfecting the physical.
Based on this, the statement Yaakov made to Yitzchak when he received the brachos, “I am Eisav, your firstborn” (Bereishis 27:19), was actually true. Yaakov did not lie to Yitzchak; rather, he revealed a deep truth. Yaakov had undergone an existential metamorphosis. He took on Eisav’s role and, in a deep way, became Eisav. With respect to his spiritual role, Yaakov was now both Yaakov and Eisav. Yaakov, the pillar of truth, didn’t lie to Yitzchak; he revealed the inner truth of this new spiritual identity, his new spiritual role.
Yaakov, Rochel, And Leah
This idea completely transforms our perception of Yaakov’s relationship with Rochel and Leah. As Rashi explains, Rochel was destined to marry Yaakov, and Leah was originally destined to marry Eisav, which is why she constantly cried (Rashi, Bereishis 29:17). However, once Yaakov took over Eisav’s mission, he married both Rochel and Leah, a reflection of his new dual role.
Marriage is an existential bond where two opposites combine into a harmonious oneness. Eisav’s orientation and mission were completely physical, and he was therefore meant to marry Leah, a woman who was completely spiritual. She was destined to help Eisav manifest control over the physical world in order to perfect it and prepare it for Yaakov’s spiritual mission.
The same dynamic applied to Yaakov and Rochel. Yaakov, who was completely spiritual (“Ish tam yoshev ohalim,” Bereishis 25:27), was destined to marry Rochel, whose strength lay in her ability to properly use the physical. Rochel embodied the perfection of physicality and was the ideal partner to help Yaakov connect his spiritual potency to the physical world. This is why Rochel is described as physically beautiful (Bereishis 29:17), and why Yosef, their son, is the only male in the Torah who is described as physically beautiful. Rochel’s physical beauty reflected her role: Her physical body loyally reflected her spiritual soul, and her mission was to help Yaakov fully manifest the spiritual within the physical world.
Change Of Plans
However, as Eisav continued down the wrong path, Yaakov and Rivkah saw that he wouldn’t play the role he was meant to. As such, the plan had to change. Once Yaakov bought the bechorah from Eisav, he took over both roles; he became both Yaakov and Eisav. Accordingly, he now had to marry both Rochel and Leah! The Yaakov in him had to marry Rochel, and the Eisav in him had to marry Leah. Consequently, when Lavan tricked Yaakov, it wasn’t regarding his marriage to Leah, but only the order in which he would marry her. Instead of marrying Rochel first, he was tricked into marrying Leah first. But he was destined to marry Leah all along!
Our Role
We are entrusted with the power of choice; we choose how to use the potential we are given, how to see the physical world, and how to live our lives. We must ask ourselves: “What kind of house am I building?” Are we building a broken, sloppy house? Or are we building something beautiful and majestic, something we have invested in and committed ourselves to? Let’s follow in Yaakov’s footsteps: Let’s focus on harmony, synthesis, and oneness, as opposed to machlokes, breakdown, and turmoil. Our journey in life is like building a skyscraper; every day is another brick, another opportunity to add to our eternal self, our eternal existence. The end result is the product of every bit of effort that we have invested. May we be inspired to devote our lives to building the extraordinary, so that one day we can look back and see the beautiful skyscraper we have built.
Rabbi Shmuel Reichman is an international speaker, bestselling author, business coach, the CEO of SMA, and a TED Talk Speaker. His bestselling book, The Journey to Your Ultimate Self, serves as an inspiring gateway into deeper Torah thought.. Rabbi Reichman provides a unique 1-on-1 coaching program where he helps high-achievers, coaches, and business owners achieve their financial and personal goals. To learn more or to get in contact with Rabbi Reichman, visit his website: www.ShmuelReichman.com.
