“It’s a boy!” is a phrase that you do not hear too often in my and my wife’s family. My wife had two sisters and her mother had two sisters. We have four daughters. My daughter Penina had a girl. Thus, for four generations, there were only girls in my wife’s line.
My mother had two sisters. Her sister had only girls. I have a sister; I was the only boy. My sister has three girls. Thus, at one time, my mother had seven granddaughters and one great-granddaughter, but no grandsons.
That is no more. Penina had another child, a boy, whose bris milah was last Shabbos. I was the sandek, which is a great z’chus, but I felt a little uneasy. Maybe it was a little too close for comfort. The boy’s name is Yosef Avraham (Joseph Abraham). Yosef is named after Beth’s father, her uncle who did not have children, and my son-in-law Yehuda’s grandfather. Avraham is after my father and my mother’s father. I never met my mother’s father; he died before my parents met.
There is something special about having a Shabbos bris. The child is having this momentous action of a bris, which is fundamental to Judaism, on the day that is also holy and fundamental to our faith. Also, since it is Shabbos and people are not in a hurry to leave for work, there are more people who attend. The two downsides, however, are: 1) that you cannot take any pictures or videos for the occasion. That may have been a good thing here, since you could not see my expression while the mohel was at work, and 2) people who would need to drive to the bris were unable to attend because of Shabbos (sleeping over was not an option).
There is a second reason why the date of the bris was so meaningful. It was my grandfather’s 44th yahrzeit. I do not believe it was random. Although the baby was not named after him but after his son, the date was in his merit. My grandfather kept Shabbos in America when it was difficult to do so. The standard refrain was, “If you do not want to work on Saturday then don’t bother coming in on Monday.” My grandfather was repeatedly fired or not hired because he wanted to keep Shabbos. Back then, hashkamah minyanim were not just for those who wanted to daven early, but for those who wanted to daven before having to go to work on Shabbos. He was the only grandparent who was alive at my bar mitzvah and lived long enough to see two of his grandchildren become frum (another grandchild became frum later). It is only fitting that the bris of his great-great-grandchild, which indicates the connection between Jewish people and G-d, happened on his yahrzeit.
Although I have been in West Hempstead three out of the past four Shabbasos, there is no truth to the rumor that I am going to follow a few of my fellow columnists and move there. I was there for the aufruf of Dani Miller the day before he married my daughter Yael Rebecca, the following week for Shabbos sheva brachos, and now for the shalom zachar and the bris. It is nice to be there for simchos, but Kew Gardens Hills is my home, and we plan to stay here. While I was galivanting to West Hempstead, the hashkamah minyan was able to thrive and run smoothly. If I stay too much longer, they may decide they don’t need me anymore. I want to thank those who helped out.
I have not mentioned much about my daughter’s wedding in my prior columns. I just want to make one observation. Once the bride’s father walks the bride to the chupah, there is not much to do. The mothers walk the bride around the chasan, while we stand in place doing nothing. One of my pet peeves at some weddings is that those in the audience are talking. While the proceedings were going on, I had a view of the crowd. At my daughter’s wedding, the guests were so quiet during the ceremony that you could hear a pin drop. I did not see anyone talking. I would like to thank the guests who gave the chupah the respect and attention it deserved. May we all be zocheh to celebrate and enjoy “s’machot” with our families and friends.
Warren S. Hecht is a local attorney. He can be reached at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
