How do you prioritize the things on your To-Do list? What’s that? Everything seems so utterly urgent? Well, look at it this way: If it’s important enough, you will find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse. I know. I made a huge To-Do list today. I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it. Come to think of it, it kind of consists of everything from my To-Do list yesterday.

Take a peek at your list. What is life or death? Is anything pressing or paramount? Okay, now be honest. What time of day are you most positive and productive? As for me, y’all know what I need. Coffee is that magical substance that turns my “Leave me alone” into “Good morning.” My body gets up and my mind usually follows sometime later in the day – hopefully. Me and mornings don’t see eye to eye, mostly because I don’t want to open mine. So, when are you most creative and constructive?

If the items on your list seem too overwhelming, then take a breather. Walk around the block. Do something relaxing. Clear that mind of yours. Are you too busy making a living that you forget to make a life?

Are you an app-and-tech fan? If so, go right ahead and let them expedite and assist you with your chores. Okay, I know how to unplug things and plug them back in again. Look at it this way: Technology makes more technology possible. “For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press four.” Then again, they say: “Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology.”

Still feeling swamped or snowed under? Start with smaller chores or errands. Believe it or not, that may give you impetus to handle your larger commitments. Break down large tasks into smaller, manageable parts. It will surely seem a lot less intimidating.

Things are not going to be equally essential. What task needs to be completed first? Put them into different groupings based on their urgency: phone calls or texts you really need to answer stat, business emails to return, or personal errands. Speaking of phone calls, do you also start phone conversations with “My phone is about to die,” just so people don’t waste your time? And, hey, don’t get upset if someone doesn’t text you back. Most people only check their phones every five seconds, every day, all day long.

The dishes are still in the sink, and the laundry is still unfolded. Yikes. You know how when she’s doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink? I see you. So how do you free up some of your brain space? You can delegate and pass some of those tasks on to him. Team effort anyone? Maybe there’s a chore you can do that will eliminate the need to even do some of the others.

We all have a thousand and one pressing needs that can cause fretfulness and flutter within us. Plan your day. Trust me: Instead of ruminating about what you have to do and when to possibly do it, have an agenda for the day. It will save you a great deal of time and energy in the end. Don’t overwhelm yourself until you burn out. Factor in your down time to just calm your frayed nerves, and don’t forget to exhale.

She seems so “together,” so how does she juggle it all? Look at it this way: If you’re juggling too many things, and you drop one, it will break. Now you have one less thing to juggle. Trying to decide if you should order that pizza or pay the bills? All of your bills say “outstanding,” so you guess you’re good to go? Hmmm. Ah, your stomach has been acting up today. So, you’re going to send a pizza down to investigate. I get it.

Believe it or not, cracking a window open and letting that warm breeze in may not only revive and resuscitate you; it can awaken some new options or ideas for when your chores are mounting. Remember that getting ’er done is its own reward, sweet friends. You got one thing done. Don’t you feel more weightless already? Oh, you thought you lost weight. Turns out your sweatpants just came untied.

Take determined actions. Do not allow yourself to fluctuate and falter. In the evening, grab yourself a cuppa hot herbal tea and try to recall what you did today. How long did that task take? Observe some of your time-wasting activities. How many irrelevant videos did you watch today? You clicked on your favorite music video and, the next thing you know, you’re learning how to make ice cream. I get it. By the way, YouTube, it’s pretty safe to assume we all want to “Skip the Ad.”

Know what you are and are not truly responsible for. Choose carefully. Make sure you understand the consequences of your choices, my friends. And when it’s all said and done: Don’t forget to lose yourself in some simple pleasures.


Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens.  She works with individuals, couples, and families.  Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends.  She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.  or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.