Dear Alice,
After months of hard work, I have finally reached my goal weight. I am so thankful and thrilled that all my efforts have paid off. Mixed with my joy, however, is shock at the comments that I have been getting from some of my friends. My friends have said things like “You are becoming anorexic,” “Your face is too skinny,” or “You are obsessed with food.” Where is this negativity coming from? It is really upsetting and quite hurtful.
Signed,
Reached my Goal.
Dear Goal Reacher,
First of all, congratulations on working hard towards something meaningful to you, and getting there! What an amazing feeling of accomplishment! I receive this question a lot - why do people start getting negative when other people lose weight? The simple answer is jealousy, but it’s worth exploring a bit further, because often, the person making the rude comments is a close friend or relative who really wants the best for us most of the time. Why are they suddenly jealous? The answer goes deep to the root of what women value.
Studies conducted on women’s priorities find that women concern themselves first with their families, followed immediately afterwards by their looks, which includes their weight. This means women place a higher priority on how they look than on finances, health, fun, work, or any other commonly held priority!
With this understanding, it makes sense that women react strongly when faced with your successful weight loss. It is something they deeply value, more than almost anything else, but have not yet attained. Keeping this in mind when faced with snide and derisive comments can help you listen to their comments without taking them personally.
As a side point, is also a good idea to double check and make sure that you aren’t talking too much about your dieting success, as this can be extremely annoying to others. And of course, make sure your weight loss journey is being conducted in a healthy manner - your friends may be genuinely concerned about you.
Best,
Alice.
Alice Harrosh, Alice Harrosh is a Nutrition Counselor and Manager at Nutrition by Tanya, with 12 locations, including one on Main street in Queens! Alice knows that making healthy choices is not always easy, as she has been through the struggle herself. As an optimistic person, Alice’s favorite quote is: “It’s never too late to start eating better. If you have a bad morning, make it a better afternoon.” For more information on Nutrition by Tanya or the TAP (Tanya-approved products) food line, please visit www.nutritionbytanya.com or call 844-Tanya-Diet (844-826-9234). For daily tips and inspiration, you may follow @nutritionbytanya on Instagram.
