Stay trippy, you little hippie. Yea, yea, you’re chanting those affirmations, got that Instagram-worthy yoga pose and Namaste going all day long; but did you squeeze in any real depth or self-awareness between those meditation sessions? Of course, you’re not the black sheep; you’re the tie-dyed one. Granted, we all want “good vibes” and would do anything to avoid discomfort at all costs. We’re seeking, struggling, and striving to fix, heal, and make ourselves whole. But I’ll bet you’ve seen some so-called spiritual folk with self-entitled judgments about anyone who disagrees with their allegedly empathetic views.
I know: “All you need is love,” but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. And hey, there’s nothing that Nutella and a spoon can’t fix. Save the planet? Of course; it’s the only one with chocolate. But I swerved off topic. If Mercury just retrograded all over you, consider some of these, please:
Do you give your loved ones and others a chance to feel truly heard and understood? And no, forcing him to change or offering her unsolicited advice all day long is not the brand of spirituality we are aiming for. When you discuss, are you trying to prove who is right, or what is right?
If you honestly pay attention, you may find that most of your convos are centered on your thoughts, needs, wants, and feelings. Answer honestly, please: Do you listen more than you talk? Do you talk when you have something to say, or when you just have to say something?
Make no mistake. We are living through harrowing times. The communal grief for all our losses is in the air. I know many of you can actually feel it. There is a monster out there, but we cannot actually see it. As a result, we have anticipatory anxiety. Where will Covey go next? Will it step on me or my loved ones? So go ahead and stockpile that Purell; but by all means stock up on compassion, as well. Everyone’s fearfulness and foreboding manifests in different ways.
Are you still stuck in the corona-chaos all around you? Where are the handshakes and hugs? No travel plans, concerts, or adventures on the horizon any time soon. You know it could be worse. The Internet could go down.
Let’s be honest. Some people have no idea what they are doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. In this life, the ones who fare well are those who find meaning in whatever they endure. Do something worthwhile to heighten your spiritual energy. Don’t simply do tasks; add value to them. Find someone you trust and spill your guts. If you pray, offer your worries and preoccupations up in prayer. Build a “sacred space” in your home where you can read, relax, contemplate, or do a daily devotion. Your perception is your reality, sweet friends.
Did you cry last night? Are you afraid to, because if you do, you think it will be a waterfall? Are you at the breaking point? Name the feeling and allow it to move through you. You have a right to your sensitivities, sweet friends. You may be afraid of becoming overwhelmed. Know this: Just because you feel something does not make it the final word.
You may be surprised at how much solace you can find in the rhythms of nature. Please do discover strength in the power of your rituals, holidays, and even the changing seasons. Remember that there is an invisible thread than connects us all on this planet. Take care of one another; help others practice hope.
Share aloud what you miss most with your friends. The hustle-bustle of getting the kids off to school and having that quiet cuppa coffee in the morning. Did you know that spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it? But seriously, doesn’t coffee smell like freshly ground Heaven?
Perhaps you feel a longing to be in the sanctuary, seeing your community members and friends praying and singing together as loud as they please. Speaking of which, don’t you hate it when you’re singing and the artist gets the words wrong? Me too. Surely you miss crowding in the aisles at the latest fashion sale in your favorite store. Hey, I just saved $198.89 by not going to Target.
Seeing smiles and responses crossing her face, instead of that muffled voice behind the cloaking and concealing face mask. Sports anyone? Does anyone even know the scores? Gathering around the sumptuous table with tons of family and friends for the holidays. Then again, did you ever look around and think: “Are these people really my relatives?” Heh.
Well, of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.
But truly, what is the atmosphere that you carry around with you and spread to others? Please make a habit of asking yourself what really matters. What makes your life worth living? Do not allow your wayward mind to lead you to negativity and despair. If you carry one thing through your entire life; let it be hope. Hope is not a feeling, sweet friends. It’s a choice. May what you love come into sharper focus than what you dread or fear.
Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens. She works with individuals, couples, and families. Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends. She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.