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Welcome back to “What weirdo technology did Mordechai buy this week?” – the column where we talk about something I bought and ask ourselves why, and in the end, we don’t really come up with an answer.  It’s all about the journey.

From time to time, I write articles about expressions that people find annoying. And some time ago, I wrote an article that commented on how many of those expressions had something to do with the concept of time. I clearly wrote that one as publicity for my newest book, Jewish Time, which was supposed to come out around then, but then somehow came out late. I don’t know.

When people ask me, “Mordechai, is there a good pet I can get that will actually give me something in return, but not nearly as much as I put into it?” I recommend chickens. Or cows, but I live in a smallish house. So chickens. Though I did finally move them outside.

I think the biggest issue with the Nobel Prizes is that it’s all for things that nobody understands.

I feel like as much as men grumble about having to build a sukkah, we do enjoy the part where we get to figure out new improvements to make to our sukkahs every year, and when they don’t work out, we get to figure out how to do it differently for next year. It’s a never-ending mitzvah!

Of all the things that could be running through your head when you’re waiting in line for kaparos on a busy Erev Yom Kippur, I feel like the main thought is, “Should I just raise my own chickens?” I mean how hard can be if Schmutter’s doing it?